New Sonic Game Poised to Disappoint Last Remaining Fan
The vicious Sonic cycle continues anew.
On Sonic the Hedgehog’s Facebook page (yes, he has one), SEGA has announced a brand new Sonic game by way of a brief teaser trailer. It’s not, as we postulated yesterday, Sonic 4 Episode 2, but an entirely new title, full of brand new hopes and dreams waiting to be crushed. But we’ve all been here before. We know how the cycle works. This trailer represents that initial stage of elation and hope. The video shows Sonic doing what Sonic does best – running – and not much else. Okay, it doesn’t sound very interesting, but here’s a list of things I’m glad it doesn’t show:
- Sonic falling in love with a human chick.
- Sonic playing any sports.
- Gun fighting. I’m serious. (I’m looking at you, Shadow.)
- These things.
- Sonic transforming into a goddamn werewolf (or werehog or whatever you want to call it).
So far, so good. Near the end of the teaser, a second Sonic appears and starts racing alongside the first one. Apparently, this one is supposed to represent the “classic” Sonic. Honestly, they look exactly the same to me. No idea if this means that SEGA is keeping the classics in mind, or if it means that you’re going to have some kind of ghost-racing feature. Knowing SEGA’s history with Sonic games, it could be something as ridiculous as a “Sonic goes back in time and meets his classic self” scenario. Maybe I’m drawing too much bias off of the recent Sonic games. Maybe this one will be a true Sonic game, with classic gameplay and no gimmicky irrelevant nonsense. Maybe it will star Sonic and only Sonic, and maybe in this game he will just run and jump and not fight with a sword or transform whenever the goddamn moon is full.
Or maybe two months from now, SEGA will release the trailer that shows all of those things. Who knows. I’m done playing boy-who-cried-Sonic-is-gonna-be-good-this-time.
I really loved Sonic, 2, 3, S&K. I stopped playing after that and good thing too as the games seemed to morph from the GOOD sonic animated series to the HORRIBLE sonic cartoon. Note: Sonic IS allowed to use a gun [item] in Smash Brothers. I have no problem with that.
That’s Smash Bros. Smash Bros doesn’t count.
The animated series would be the only heavily story based game I would like to see. Otherwise they need to keep the story light and the gameplay heavy.
tails and knuckles i dont mind. But please sega, please stop adding new characters.
Except the furries…
oh trust me! his friends will definitely show up to ruin the party! its like sonic is the coolest and most popular character on mobius and everyone follows him and tries to get his attention!
How are the fan games coming along? I remember there was a fan game that came out around the same time as episode 1.
I think the question to ask is: were the original Sonic games that great to begin with?
Yeah, Sonic makes me so depressed. When I heard they were making a 20th anniversary type thing, somehow I saw something similar to a remake of the first 4 games with updated awesome 3D graphics and nothing more, which made me excited, and then I saw Sonic racing Sonic and I was like lolwut?
I agree with blackpaw, Tails and Knuckles are cool. But that’s it. Please stop, Sega. Please
Every Sonic game I get my hopes up, despite being being disappointed every time. My hopes are up again, this time because of the glimmer of hope Sonic 4 Ep.1 gave me.
Sonic Colors was a good game who actually brokes the Sonic Cycle… I hope that Sega learned their mistakes.